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Proofread my story that I wrote?

Proofread my story that I wrote? Topic: Small story writing paper
June 25, 2019 / By Hezron
Question: The Letter There was once a mailman who sends letters to different places. “Mailman come here, you have a letter to send” the old man told the mailman. “Send this letter to my grandchildren, I want them to visit me and have a reunion with them” the old man said. “I promise I will” the mailman said. “You really should, our reunion is important; I don’t have phones so there’s no way for me to contact them if you won’t send the letter” the old man said. The old man paid the mailman in advance to send his letter. The mailman took the letter with him and left. He was walking towards the address of the grandchildren. He decided to rest on a bench. He took a nap when a cold breeze began to blow. The breeze woke him up and he saw that the letter was rolling towards the river. Fortunately, a fisherman accidentally got it hooked on his fishing rod and he handed the mailman the letter. “Thanks for saving that letter, it would have been destroyed by now if you didn’t hook it” the mailman said. “Just let it dry under the sun and soon, it’ll be okay again” the fisherman said. After half an hour, the papers were fine and the mailman continued his journey towards the house. While walking, he dropped the letter because he forgot to close the zipper of his bag. The mailman was hungry so he decided to eat snacks in the park. Soon, a janitor was sweeping the streets. He saw the letter and included it in the trash. Fortunately, another mailman saw the letter and took it out of the trash. The mailman sat on a bench in the park and read the address of the recipient of the said letter. He stood up to send the letters but he accidentally left the old man’s letter behind. Soon, a child saw the letter and decided to make it as paper airplanes or paper boats. The small child opened the letter and was about to fold it when his mother arrived. “Don’t play with that, it’s a letter someone must be expecting this” the mother said and took the letter from her son. She puts the letter back in the envelope when she noticed a mailman looking for something in the park. That mailman was the mailman whom the old man told him to send the letter to his grandchildren. “Are you looking for this letter?” the mother approached the mailman. The mailman read the address and recipient of the letter and he confirmed that it was what he was searching for. “Thanks for bringing it back to me” the mailman said. He was on his way towards the house when a naughty child opened his bag and took the letter. “Come back here” the mailman said, chasing the kid. The child threw it into the fire but fortunately, his older brother was able to catch the letter in his hands. “You’re not supposed to throw letters in the fire” the older sibling scolded the naughty child. The older sibling gave the letter to the mailman. The mailman rode on a bus going to the grandchildren’s house when the letter flew out of the window. The mailman told the driver to stop so he can get the letter. He saw the letter flying up high. Next, he saw the letter getting stuck on the electrical streetlamps. He thought of climbing but it was dangerous. Then, he saw an electrician who was fixing the streetlamps. He was climbing on a ladder. “After fixing, could you get that letter stuck in the electrical posts” the mailman said. The electrician agreed and was about to hand him the letter after fixing. A strong wind blew when the electrician dropped the letter. Suddenly, a dove picked up the letter using her beak. She went to a tree to feed her nestlings. She took a small bite and realized that the letter wasn’t edible. The mother dove dropped the letter on the ground and the mailman picked it up. The mailman was walking and was near the grandchildren’s house when a neighbor’s dog reached for his bag and grabbed the letter. The dog was about to tear up the letter into pieces when his owner arrived. “Don’t tear up the letter; that could be important” the owner told his dog. The dog obediently dropped the letter and the mailman sent it to the grandchildren. He heard that the grandchildren were planning to visit the old man the following week. The mailman went to the old man. “Were you able to send the letter?” the old man asked. “Yes and it was a lot of trouble especially when I was careless, and I heard your grandchildren will visit you here next week” the mailman answered. The mailman learned to be more careful in sending letters so he won’t have to go to a lot of trouble to send letters. .
Best Answer

Best Answers: Proofread my story that I wrote?

Elmer Elmer | 10 days ago
Interesting story. You don't have to say The mailman sends letters, we all know that so change the first line to something like Jerry was a mail man who was working one sunny morning, when he encountered an old man. And then pick up your story from there. It is easier to follow the stories if you name your characters, but it is fine the way it is. It is a nice story with a nice ending and a nice moral. I bet you could write a message in a bottle story and tell the journey the bottle takes and then tell the story of the person who sent the message and the person who finally ended up with the message and if they ever met.
👍 228 | 👎 10
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Elmer Originally Answered: Can someone please proofread my story for me?
Have someone you trust do it. Someone may steal the story and you'll just be royally fu cked. Have your mom, sibling, or friend do it. (:
Elmer Originally Answered: Can someone please proofread my story for me?
Email it to [email protected] and I'll proofread it. I'm looking into a career as a copyeditor and this would be great practice!

Clancey Clancey
I'm sorry, I just can't... You really need to break it up into paragraphs. This is just a big block of text to me.
👍 90 | 👎 7

Clancey Originally Answered: Can someone proofread my story Please?
So far it is a pretty good story, just a few grammer or word errors...I put what you used first, then after the = what changes you can try... It was strenuous work, farming was, but Digio didn’t complain. = Farming was strenuous work, but Digio didn't complain. (skip the 'it' and get to what 'it' was) began to embed = began to plant (wrong use of embed) never been in the ground to begin with= never been in the ground. (or) never been in the ground at all. stood, petrified as a rock, several minutes= rock, FOR several minutes (though sentence is awkward, but not wrong, would be easier to take out the 'as a rock' for better flow) and utterly scaring Digio. = awkward use of 'utterly'...maybe thoroughly or completely would be better... the genie bantered=wrong context of bantered, that implies a conversation between more than one person going back and forth. You mean something more like declared or announced... will be a callous one = callous in wrong word, it means insensitive; indifferent; unsympathetic, or hard but in the sense of not soft, like hard skin....difficult or treacherous would be better Farewell farmer, good luck on your quest.” With those words of farewell = use a different word for one of the farewell's (goodbye for first, or departure for second...etc) This is meant to be,” thought Digio= meant to be what? From it he had learned that his first step to walk north, several kilometers towards the town of Isfahan.= confusing...make it simple (To begin the journey he had to walk several kilometers north to the town of Isfahan) Just before he was to reach the gates of the town, he was supposed to spot a cavern, at the very end of the cavern lay his treasure. = Just before the gates of the town, there is a cavern, in which lay his treasure. what felt like ages he could see the gates of =what felt like ages, he could see the gates of (needs a comma) Digio looked around, quickly= Digio quickly looked around. fear lay ahead- fear lies ahead.
Clancey Originally Answered: Can someone proofread my story Please?
i'd deliver it to a pair of publishers- it won't be able to harm to deliver a replica interior the submit can it? Then, see if any of them like it and how lots they like you to pay. do no longer situation if human beings turn you down, even JK Rowling have been given grew to become down thousands of situations for Harry Potter!

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