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College? What to do? What is smart?

College? What to do? What is smart? Topic: List of case study houses
July 19, 2019 / By Caron
Question: Okay so here's my situation: I want to go to college out of state in Florida but don't want to move home every summer because I have to so I was wanting to live in a dorm for my first year of college and before that ended find someone who is looking for a roommate or find an apartment and find a roommate and just continue to live in that apartment or house for the rest of my years of college. OR!!! should I just find someone who is looking for a roommate right and away and just live there? Which option would be SMART????. I don't want to continually move from home to school and back home again, I just want to stay grounded in one place since even after college I still want to live in the state of Florida and carry out the rest of my life there.
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Angeline Angeline | 1 day ago
There are a few matters which your question does not explain. Have you already been admitted into a college in Florida? Has the matter of "out of state" tuition been handled? Have you applied for space in a dorm? (Not everyone who wants to live in a dorm gets accepted. The space is limited.) In any case, assuming those matters are taken care of, your question is whether it is wiser to live in a dorm first or try for an apartment from the very beginning. The answer is that the dorm is the better choice. College is a time of gigantic changes and adjustments. The fewer responsibilities you heap on yourself, the better off you will be. Why take on the tasks of cooking, cleaning, and maintaining a home? And particularly so when you'll be sharing it with someone you never met. The smart idea is to give yourself a chance to meet some people, develop friendships, and scope out the situation. At this point, you have no concept of where the best areas of town are to live in, who would make a good roommate, what living off campus will be like, how difficult it will be to schedule your college study workload around responsibilities at home, and a million other things. Live in the dorm, let others shoulder some of the tasks, and give yourself a chance to find out what college is like. Sure, the dorm food will not be great, the place will be noisy, you won't like some of the rules, and there will be a dozen other reasons to move out. When you've got them all listed, you have some roommates in mind, and you're ready for a more challenging life, then will be the time to get an apartment.
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Angeline Originally Answered: Am I not smart enough?
If you were a straight A student in California I don't think your problem is that you are not smart enough. One factor here, is that your brother, being younger than you, is almost certain to be better at your host country language than you--to pick it up faster--and to pick up the nuances faster. The younger you are when you move into a culture which speaks a different language than you the easier and more naturally you learn it. So your brother has an advantage over you there. Since you are older the materials that you were studying in school were more more difficult, used more difficult language, and contained more difficult ideas. There is a difference between everyday conversational language and the language of scholarship. There are also cultural nuances, shared ways of thinking and shared national experiences that the children of your host country grew up with. You do not share these and they can get in the way of understanding. Even in our native tongue it is possible to understand every word a person is saying and have no clue to what they are talking about. How much more is this true when you move into a new country. Here's a list of things to think about: 1. The first has to do with pressures and expectations which you and/or your parents may have had on you in regards to attending school and/or your brother having less trouble. I think it would be good if you could think this through and maybe show your parents what I've written and talk it through with them. 2. How important is it to you to be able to go to school with the rest of the kids. There is a social element here you need to think about. There is also the element of whether or not you will feel a failure because you feel that you couldn't run with the horsemen, so to speak. It's not that you are a failure, because I don't think that for the world, but what you feel about it in yourself is very important. 3. What are your future plans. Are you hoping to have a career which would use the language of your host country, or take you back there to work someday. And now, if, after thinking things through and talking things through with your parents, you still think you want to try the national school, then I would suggest that you and your parents let you go and get you a private tutor to work with you in the evenings. It would be a larger commitment than home schooling. In the long run, and depending on your character, your drive, and your ambitions, it could pay you back many times over. Now, to let you know. I grew up in three countries. And I understand what it means to make these huge leaps into new places. I have lived outside the States as long as I have lived in them (and that's a fairly long time). I have had to learn a second language as an adult in order to live in a fourth country. I have taught ESL for over 20 years, and I now tutor students from foreign countries. Believe me when I say that I understand a good deal about your problem just from your question, and that I consider it the issue to be one of first importance in your life right now. And worth every effort you and your parents can make to come to a decision that YOU feel is the best one for you, and that YOU can accept without feeling that you are somehow not smart enough, not good enough, not up to par, not able to cut the cake. Your parents need to know how you feel. If they have not spent much time out o the US they may not understand the special problems and fears and needs of "Third Culture Kids" (which is what you and I are), or the long term effects if you don't work it through now. Write back, or have your parents write me if you want to discuss this further.
Angeline Originally Answered: Am I not smart enough?
You're still smart! You just may not have been performing well in your new environment because of stress, or a slew of other things. If you don't like homeschool, you should tell your parents that you want to come back to public/private school. Once you're more comfortable with your new country, then I'm positive you'll become that straight A student again, and quite possible the star of the school! Califronia has really good school systems, so you probably know a lot more than the other students already! Just try not to think about how you're performing as compared to your brother, and think about being the best again! You're still smart, and you'll always be, and a test can't tell you any different!
Angeline Originally Answered: Am I not smart enough?
You are plenty smart. Younger children tend to adapt to changes better. Don't compare yourself with the situation or the new country or even your brother. Be yourself and do the best you can do that is all you can expect of yourself. Moving is a big adjustment in this country, it must be very different for you. The stress is probably what is causing the problem. Accept that you are as smart as you want to be and everything else will fall into place. Fear is another thing that can distract you. I'm sure you miss your friends and your old home as well. Hang in there, you are fine, you just haven't adjusted yet.
Angeline Originally Answered: Am I not smart enough?
Sure you are smart enough if you use to get straight A's. Younger children pick up different languages better. Is there no American school that you can go to there? Don't compare yourself to anyone but yourself. You'll be OK. Once you have been there a little longer you may be able to fit in the school system there. Teaching methods may be different than what you are use to. Maybe you could go to school for a class or two to get you acclimated to the system there. Good luck in your studies and keep up the good work.

Angeline Originally Answered: Are Dogs really that smart?
The funny thing is they really do. They learn from there mistakes just like people can. Like if the dog went out of its yard that had an electric fence and they got shocked they would learn not to do it again. In this case your dog has learned if she chases the squirrel then she will never catch it because she is to slow. She also realized they always run for the tree, so this time she cut them to the chase. Some dogs are smarter than others, it sounds like you have a very smart dog on your hands.
Angeline Originally Answered: Are Dogs really that smart?
She either had an experiance that made her a squirrel hunter or was taught by someone previously to go for them either way she has a mind set and there is no stopping her. Dogs do have a mind of their own and they also have a sixed sense that also allows them to pick up on things that must of us can't. I have a dog of 10 years that had an experiance as a young pup that he never forgot even to today that makes him even now that he is 9 years passed this, still have the same reaction to this thing that he saw as a young pup and he still remembers the family that had him for the first 3months of his life even though he has been in his life with me for all these years.
Angeline Originally Answered: Are Dogs really that smart?
Our new addition to the family is a bit freaked out by being left alone. He still chews, so we cage him when we are gone. He escaped the metal cage, defeated the lock on the dog door securer, opened the back gate latch, and was waiting for use on the front porch. We named him Houdini. Yes, dogs are that smart.

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