What do you think happened here:(?
Topic: Get post case sensitive
June 17, 2019 / By Christabel Question:
This girl that I like from work fully organised for us to go to the big show that comes to our city every year. She first texted me wanted to do something and I suggested this show but she was already going with her family. Then a few days later she told me that she wanted to go again. Once I said yes she was paying me heaps of attention and starting texts with Hey you!:)
I am 19 and she is 16. We also don’t know each other very well, only from brief chats at work and a few texts here and there.
Anyway, the night turned into a disaster. Everything was perfect until we ran into 2 friends of hers 10 minutes after we got there. They were rude girls who stayed with us uninvited for 3 hours! The girl I was there with was asking me if it was ok, but I couldn’t really say anything in front of the others. She went on to apologise and said that I probably regretted going with her. She clearly felt bad about it all and my body language must have been screaming that I was annoyed. After we left them I was so frustrated and I stupidly told her that I thought they were extremely rude and complained a lot. From then on the mood had been killed. There was quite a bit of silence while we were watching some of the shows and we weren’t exactly sitting close together. Twice she went to buy food for us by herself saying that I should mind the seats. That was true though, it was packed and we had front row seats.
On the way home we had good conversation and it was really nice. The next day I texted her something funny about a colleague that I saw somewhere and she replied nicely, but no smileys at all. Since the night we went to the show she has also been posting facebook statuses like: don’t assume someone likes you because of their sweetness, you could be just an option when theyre bored. AND: why am I wasting time on somebody who doesn’t give a **** about me. I then saw her at work a few days later and she said hello nicely but didn’t talk at all. The next day it was obvious that she completely avoided me. Soon after that I saw her post: you obviously have no idea how much you have hurt me. These statuses could have been about anyone, but she hadn’t really done anything but work since that night.
At this point I decided that seeing as im clearly a bad person and ive screwed up that I need to text her. So I did, apologizing for judging her friends and saying that we should catch a movie next week if shes up for it. I got the reply: Hey.. yeh nah dw about it. And idk if I can sorry.
I honestly don’t know what happened :( How did I upset her?
Did she like me and I hurt her, or could she have just wanted to be friends?
Best Answers: What do you think happened here:(?
Augusta | 9 days ago
i totally understand your responses, and i would also have read those status updates as if they were about me. I think you did the right thing apologizing. i would have persued the question a bit further and maybe said that i read her statuses on facebook and that if it was me that seemed to not give a crap you really feel bad cause thats not the case at all. id rather make a fool of myself in assuming (wrongly) that it was about me, than be the jerk that doesnt take the hints. so me personaly id persue it making sure that its obvious that you want to mend any bad feelings that might have developed on her end and keep going on dates. cause i think its likely that those statuses were about you, and i think shes having a problem communicating it directly. her change of style in texts after the dates and the statuses corresponding to you guys meeting would suggest so.
it might be an example where shes feeling too hurt/tiny/insecure to adress the problems but rather swiping it off with a "dw". if she thinks you dont give a crap then naturally she doesnt think youd want to go 'into' any problems there might be. fortunately you seem a sensitive and nice guy, and i think if you keep communicating quite openly with her, from the stand of "hey .. i got nothing to loose so might as well", then you might be able to turn this one around. dont ask for more dates untill its resolved and her attitude seems to be back to where it was. you can even take a lil leap of faith and write something along the lines of "hey you know that i like you a lot, right? :)". I would go for it, in this case. I think its just to assume she was/is into you
dont assume she just wanted to be friends. if it turns out this was the case you were still totally reasonable in assuming it wasnt.
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Maybe you should not tell that her friends were rude the first day you go out together. They are HER friends,they are people who this girl spends time with. Your comments could hurt her. Probably you should apologize again, tell that you were wrong, say that you didnt want her feel bad, that you have been worried about it all days,feeling sorry. Tell that you care about her! Good luck!
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Originally Answered: Has this ever happened to you.?
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