Is this an issue to flip flop on?
Topic: Not case sensitive meaning for kids
May 26, 2019 / By Debs Question:
My bf and I have discussed before that we both want to have children when married. My bf has a daughter already and I have no children that I bring to the relationship. The other night TO his daughter he said that he was happy just having her and that he didnt want to have anymore children. I over heard this and let it go. I just brought it up to him now and he said that he never said that and got VERY angry with me for bringing it up and said that his daughter would LOVE for him not have anymore kids... I told him this wasnt an issue Im willing to flip flop on and that he shouldnt be telling his daughter this if it wasnt true. The argument grew and now he is mad at me saying that I tell him how to parent bc I told him he shouldnt tell his daughter that if he didnt mean it. What is a woman to do in this situation?? He claims just now (not around his daughter) that he does want more children when he is married... which am I suppose to believe?
Best Answers: Is this an issue to flip flop on?
Brittania | 4 days ago
I'm with you; lying to your children only hinders their ability to trust others.
But maybe it isn't as insidious as that. Perhaps his daughter is extremely attached to him and because he's no longer with her mother, he is sensitive to her attachment. Perhaps that will change in time, should you and he have children, and they are introduced into his existing daughter's life.
Perhaps he felt embarrassed about his willingness to play into his daughter's attachment, which is why he got angry. However, he should be willing to discuss the subject without getting defensive; you had a valid point. However, unless you are close with his daughter, it might be a subject he has to "warm up to" on his own before broaching it with his daughter in a constructive way.
Perhaps he truly doesn't want more children himself and is only afraid of hurting YOU?
Without knowing him or you, it's hard to say. I would try discussing it with him when he's not so defensive and without mentioning his daughter. Let him know children are important to you and you definitely want them in your future (if this is the case). Tell him it's all right to feel however he feels about more kids, but it would be fair to let you know now rather than later if his heart's truly into having more children.
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Originally Answered: What's soo wrong with flip-floping? How many of us have been right all the time, about all things?
There is nothing wrong with changing your mind for the right reasons. Perhaps you get a better understanding of a situation or more comprehensive information becomes available-there is no problem to adjusting to the matter or threats at hand. But there is something wrong if you have no convictions and change your position every time you are criticized. When you get criticized for your beliefs that is not the time to change what you believe. This is where trust comes in. I need to be able to trust the discernment and decisions of my politicians. Personally, I do not trust Obama. I know whom he has chosen to hang out with-Mr. Wright, a pastor who hates America and white people, Mr. Ales, a home grown terrorist, Mr. Rezko, a real estate con man. Obama benefitted off a shady real estate deal with Mr. Rezko, but what did he get from the terrorist? what did he get from the anti-American pastor? in both cases he got his point of view. I don't share his point of view on America and the world. I trust McCain alot more than I trust Obama. It's ok to change your mind for the right reasons-but you must be able to stand behind your decisions and coherently defend your decisions.
His daughter probably doesn't want her dad to forget about her when he starts having kids with you (You forgot to include the daughter's age) and he's probably trying to reassure her that she'll stay the only one. But HER wants shouldn't trump your own. Tell him that you want a family and you want him to want a family of your own as well. HE has a child, YOU don't, that's not fair when you want one of your own as well.
If he makes a huge deal out of it, I wouldn't trust him to stick around if you DID have a kid. Be careful, you don't want to get stuck with his child either if he takes off. Think about what you want first. I'm not preaching, but marriage might be better to have before a family. Then he's committed to you at least. And you have many more rights as a wife than you do as a girlfriend.
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If you can't agree on whether or not to have anymore kids, you need to rethink the relationship... If he's flat out lying to you there might be other issues as well... Also if his daughter is so selfish that she not want to share her daddy with a baby sib then she's got problems and they'll be yours if you have any more kids.
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i think he might be lying and he doesn't want to have kids or he could be saying that so his dughter won't get hurt
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Originally Answered: When you get ready to vote, which of these Romney flip flops will you think about?
So considering that a character is inclined to undertake new things into their lifestyles and move earlier different matters they are a mendacity horrible member of a cult. During historical past it has been those who had been willing to undertake to new methods of existence which have created the largest and pleasant changes in society. While I have no idea if Romney will deliver about that variety of exchange, I don't care. Through the years i've transformed my mind about many things. As I discovered new things, or extra a few field, on any occasions i realized I was once wrong or observed a greater factor than what I had beforehand held to. People who in no way change, by no means grow. There is certainly a word that is probably used to explain folks that refuse to vary. It is called cussed, and they're more commonly hated for being that means. What I see hear is not so much an hindrance of any person changing as I do devout bigotry and prejudice. @edit What.